Face Down
by JYu.Lee
Summary: If Alec was an abuser, if Cal didn't know what was going on, if Gillian had to live with the pain, what would happen? What would happens when Cal goes looking for Gillian?


**My first songfic. The song is Face Down by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus :)**

_Hey girl, you know, you drive me crazy_  
_One look puts the rhythm in my hand_  
_Still I'll never understand why you hang around_  
_I see what's goin' down_

"How your doin, love?"

"Great." She walked away.

He watched after her. He knew something was wrong. Since the beginning of the week she's been acting weird. She never looked at him in the eye, she never smiled, she never made any jokes. It was like there was a clone Gillian. He didn't understand it. He didn't see it, and that was what made him more frustrated. He's been trying to make her talk. He's been trying to take her home at a late night but when ever he asked, she said no and went into her own car. When he walked passed her office, she'd be busy with paperwork.

_Cover up with make up in the mirror_  
_Tell yourself it's never gonna happen again_

Before work, she'd always put on extra make up, to cover up the bruises. She didn't want anyone to see, especially not Cal. She didn't want him to see her so weak, so vulnerable. She wanted to appear strong in front of him. But it hurt. It hurt when her husband beat her in his drunken state. She had bruises all over her body, she never wore a dress anymore, just jeans and a long sleeve, sometimes even a turtleneck.

She couldn't do anything about it. He was stronger than her. When Cal would ask to drive her home, she'd decline, she didn't want him to get in the middle of this and get hurt, or worse...

She faced herself in the mirror, and chanted, 'It's not going to happen again. It's not going to happen again.' Every morning she would, try to remind herself that she had a real friend at work, that she could seek comfort in him. She wished that was true...

_You cry alone and then he swears he loves you_

A single tear escaped her eye. She didn't want to cry again, she wouldn't. She angrily wiped away the tear and stood up, turning around. But her eyes met Alec's. His hair was messed up, his tie hanging by the neck. He came forward. Gillan, who was expecting another hit, flinched as he came close to her. But instead, her held her gently by the arms.

"I'm sorry." He said. "I love you."

Gillian gulped. He was lying. "I know." she said, not wanting to get another beating. "I love you to."

...

"Love, what's going on?"

Cal pulled Gillian to the side. They were in interrogation room. He was concerned for her. Very concerned. He still didn't know what was wrong and it was seriously scaring the absolute shit out of him. He would see her walking into the office and not leaving until late that afternoon, sometimes she wouldn't even go out to eat lunch. He would bring it for her. She seemed to be starving herself.

She didn't know if she should tell him. He couldn't protect her though, she had pushed him away. Even if he did come to the house, he would get hurt. He might win yes, but he'd get hurt. She didn't want that. She couldn't bear to live on if her got hurt. No, she wouldn't tell him. She'd live with it. And maybe one day she'll gather up the courage to stand up to Alec.

"Nothing." She shrugged it off as if it wasn't anything.

_Do you feel like a man, when you push her around?_  
_Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?_  
_Well, I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end_  
_As your lies crumble down, a new life she has found_

_A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect  
Every action in this world will bear a consequence  
If you wade around forever you will surely drown  
I see what's going down_

Another three days passed. Cal was tapping his pen on a file he was supposed to be reading, his foot propped up on his desk. Gillian hadn't changed. In fact, she'd been more and more distant. He couldn't quite put a finger on it. He didn't know why she was acting the way she was. For once in his life time, he wasn't sure, about anything. She never wore dresses anymore, just jeans and shirts. It was 9 PM. Everybody in the office had gone home, even Gillian. His office was lit by a dim lamp beside his desk. He twirled around in his chair and stared out the window. DC was still busy. The lights covered the entire city, it never seemed to sleep. Day and night, it was busy.

His thoughts were still on Gillian, however. Why she was acting that way. She had pushed him away in the past, but not for this long, not for a month, no. It was frustrating, and sometimes he even got angry, at himself mostly, wondering what he had done wrong. He had recalled every little detail of the passed few months, to see what he had done. He had come up with the conclusion that he did do some stupid things but not enough to make her practically ignore him for the passed month. He ran a frustrated sigh through his hair. What on earth was going on? He slammed his fist onto his chair arm rester. He was going to figure out himself, tonight. He got up and walked out of his office, car keys in hand.

...

SMACK!

She fell to the floor, her arms breaking her fall. Bruises covered her body as she uncontrollably wept. A hand gripped her by the arm and jerked her up again. She found herself staring into her husbands eyes. They were cold, had no life in them. This wasn't the man she married, no, it wasn't. The pain in her body was brain racking. She was cold, although they were inside the house. He hit her again. He watched her fall. Her limp frame was on the ground. She didn't want to move, she felt numb. She just wished Cal was here.

'No! Don't be so selfish!' her mind yelled.

When Alec saw that she wasn't moving, he growled, "Get the hell up!"

_Face down in the dirt she said, This doesn't hurt_  
_She said, I finally had enough_

She still didn't make a move to get up. She was tried. Tired of his beatings. Tired of pretending when she went to work. Tired of covering half her skin with dark makeup. Tired of having to lie to Cal, to face him everyday and look at him in the eyes and see the betrayal. Tired of lying to the one person who she could count on, her soul mate. She was tired of everything.

_I see the way you go and say you're right again_  
_Say you're right again, heed my lecture_

Alec dragged her out of the house. She hadn't said a word. She just went along. He was carrying her down the steps. The cool night air hit her as hard as the waves of the ocean. It sent goosebumps down her arms. But she didn't move. She just let him have his way. She focused her thought on Cal, his smile, his voice, his ways. It made the pain go away. She imagined that she was in his arms right now, not Alec's. She imagined that she was in his office, the warm yet oddly unique place, and having tea, his smile.

She heard the car door open. She felt the cold leather seat against her skin. Then she heard a voice she never thought she'd hear.

_Do you feel like a man, when you push her around?_

"Oi!" He yelled out. He swirved the car to a stop right in front of Alec's van. He nearly jumped out of his seat and slammed the door. He could see Gillian, halfway in the van. For a minute, he was filled with dread, thinking she was dead, that he had come too late. But he saw the fall and rise of her chest and breathed out a sigh of relief. He searched around. No one else was there. What the hell? He ran to her, not seeing Alec behind the truck.

_Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?_

"Gillian!"

She heard his voice. At first, she thought she was dreaming. He was here? Why? She stirred and lifted her head, pushing past the pain. She turned on her stomach and glanced at him. It was him! He found her! But as she looked around, she couldn't see Alec. Did he go? Was he that much of a coward?

When he reached her and was instantly filled with anger from toe to head.

"Gillian." He barely whispered her name. He choked up the tears that were threatening to fall and took off his jacket, draping it across her back. He could see the bruises now, he could see why she hadn't worn dresses in a while. He cursed inwardly. He hadn't seen it. Hadn't seen the signs. His jaw clenched as he swore to kill the bastard who did this to his Gillian.

She was instantly filled her warmth. His scent was around her, his jacket on her. She looked up and tried to smile. She opened her mouth to say she was okay but saw the shadow behind him. Her eyes widened in horror. "Cal! Watch out!"

_Well, I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end_

He hadn't seen it coming. He turned around but was hit with a glass bottle to the side of his head. In a second, he was on the floor, blood oozing out of his wound. It felt like his head had been split open. Before he could react to the pain, he felt himself being pulled up by his collar and shoved to the wall of the house. He heard Gillian screaming to stop. His head jerked to the left as he was punched. A hand was still holding him by the collar. He was punched in the stomach and he doubled over in pain, gasping for air. He was let go and he fell to the floor. A foot found his stomach and winded him. He fell on his side with a thump and swallowed gulps of air.

"Get up," a voice said to him.

His brows furrowed, he knew that voice. It took him a while, but he remembered. "Alec?" He looked up and found Alec looking back, a goofy grin on his face. Cal was momentarily surprised. He did this to Gillian? His own wife? Alec Foster? The man who can't see without his damn glasses?

...

"No! Stop!" she yelled at the top of her lungs. She tried to move, tried to help. But the pain got the best of her and she slumped back down. This couldn't be happening, not Cal! She could only watch as Alec punched him in the face. She watched as Cal slumped against the brick wall and Alec punching him again. She saw Cal fall to the ground, his face crunched up in pain and half his forehead caked with blood. Her stomach formed a guilt trip as she continue to watch. Tears were threatening to fall. She heard Alec tell him get up and saw his expression change to absolute surprise.

...

"That's right." His speech sounded like it was muffled.

Cal could smell the alcohol in his breath. It made him sick to the stomach. He could hear his own dad in the back of his head. When he beat his mother, heard her cries from down the stairs. He remembered that he promised himself he would never grow up the same. Alec was no different. And it made him sick.

For a moment, he was blinded by rage at what he had done to Gillian. The pain was forgotten as he charged himself at Alec, both falling to the ground in a tangle of arms. Alec kicked Cal in the stomach again, winding him. Cal rolled to his side, getting the upper hand. He punched Alec once, twice, three times, then he lost count. He had absolutely no idea how many times he hit that heartless bastard. Both his fists were numb by the time he finished. He was breathing heavily, his eyes wild. He looked down at Alec who was unconscious, but breathing. He slumped down away from him with a huge sigh. His hands were bloody and his knuckles hurt. He sat there staring at him until Gillian pulled him back to reality.

"C-Cal?" she called.

She had seen the whole thing go down. She didn't know Cal could be that violent, never thought he would be like that in front of her. But she had seen the wild side of Cal Lightman, and she wasn't scared or afraid. She was relieved that he was ok though. For a moment she thought that Cal would be lying somewhere, bleeding and she couldn't do anything about it.

Cal jerked his head up at her voice. He had momentarily forgotten she was there too. He shuffled himself to his feet and almost fell again. His chest burst with pain and he was sure now that he had a fractured rib or something. He ignored it and tried to act like it was nothing, although inside it was killing him. He stumbled his way over to Gillian and hugged her. She hugged back.

They pulled away and she kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you," she whispered.

Cal shook his head. "Are you ok?"

Gillian smiled warmly. "I am now. You?"

"Fine."

She knew he was lying, she could see it in his face, the pain he was trying to cover up. She put a hand on his cheek and rubbed her thumb against it. He looked at her in the eyes.

"Gillian, I'm sorry-" he started.

"For what? It wasn't your fault." She looked away. "I was an idiot."

"No you weren't!" He said. He gently lifted her head so that her could see her eyes. "Gillian it's never your fault that he was a bastard. You know that right?"

This was all like a flashback for him. When his friends and family had told_ him _that it wasn't his fault his dad was a drunkard and his mother had suicided.

"Yea," she smiled, "I do."

Cal smiled back. He stared into her beautiful pools of green for a moment, lost by the beauty. Then, unexpectedly, he kissed her, full in the mouth.

Gillian smiled against the kiss as she kissed back. Then he gently pulled back and leaned their foreheads against eachother. "I love you, Gillian."

She sat there, in awe for a moment. Did he really say he loved her? Was this a dream? Her face beamed as she realized she had heard it right. Without wasting another minute, she said, "I love you too, Cal. With all my heart."

_As your lies crumble down, a new life she has found_

**So tht was it! i hope you guys liked it hehe ^^**


End file.
